ArmedAndDangerous
by Leoloco
Summary: The secret life of Don Eppes.


A/N: Lynn pointed me to a very silly mistake in Don's age. I seriously have no idea why I wrote 44. Anyway, he's back to 37 now. Thanks Lynn!

ArmedAndDangerous

This had been one of those days. With nothing much to do except filing reports, doing paperwork and drinking lots of coffee to stay awake, Don's mind had began to wander. He kept thinking about what else he could be doing right now, and that made him even more restless. He knew that this was his job, and for the most part he loved it, but that didn't mean that he didn't have any other hobbies. And when a day at work is going terribly slow, he couldn't help but fantasize a little about what he could be doing instead. Unfortunately, he knew he wasn't going anywhere for the next 4 hours or so.

At the end of the day Don was sure his head was toast. He had been bored out of his mind and when he looked at his colleagues he could see he wasn't the only one. David and Colby were both getting up from their desks, stretching their legs and arms, and after a goodbye wave they headed for the elevator. As he was their boss and shouldn't leave before they did, this was for Don the cue that he could also turn off his computer, get his jacket and head home. Finally.

It took him three times as long as usual to finally arrive at his apartment, because LA traffic had been hell today, but now he was here, and he knew exactly what he was going to do. Without even removing his jacket he headed for his computer and booted up. Only now did he put down his jacket and went to the refrigerator to get himself a drink. With a soda in his hand he headed back for the computer and sat down behind it.

After the computer had booted up Don opened up his e-mail inbox, the one he had created a while ago for only one purpose, and smiled when he saw that he had 5 new mails. He loved getting fanmail.

He opened the first one.

'_I just finished reading your latest fic and I just loved it! I think you write so well! It's always nice to read JavaJunkie fics, but I think yours just rock! Hope you write again soon!!'_

Don smiled even more now, this was what he loved most about writing fanfic. The reviews. It certainly helped that he was quite an experienced writer now and that he had created a substantial fanbase. There were dozens of people, most female he suspected, who had him on story or author alert on and he had tons of friends at his LiveJournal. With every chapter or new story he wrote he could count on at least 10 new messages in his e-mail inbox. It felt so good to be loved. He opened another one.

'_Wonderful fic! I really love your characterizations of Luke and Lorelai and I just melted when I read that ending. How incredibly romantic! I truly think you're an expert on writing shippy LL fic, because your just keep coming up with new romantic ideas. Your lovelife must be amazing! I mean, a girl has got to get her inspiration from somewhere, right?'_

That happened a lot, he noticed. People kept thinking he was a she. Of course, he knew that the majority of all fanfic writers were female, but he had mentioned his gender on his personal pages. Not that it mattered that much, as long as people thought he was amazing he was happy. The other thing that he noticed a lot was that people kept admiring his romantic writing skills. If only they knew that he was a 37 year old single man. Ok, he dated once in a while, but he was sure that no one who knew him would call him 'Mr. Romantic'. If only they knew.

He opened the third mail.

'_So AAD, when are you finally writing your next fic? I know that you usually update every other day, and that I shouldn't complain when you're only a few days late, but come on! I'm experiencing some major cold turkey here! I. Need. More. JavaJunk. Fics. From. You! _

_Seriously, I think yourre awesome. Please write more. Please._

_Leela.'_

She was right. He usually had his head full of ideas, but after he had finished his latest fic he hadn't been able to think of anything new. He had once tried to write something completely different, like a story for ER, or even within the fandom, like more about Rory and Logan, but in his heart he knew he would always be a Luke & Lorelai shipper, or JavaJunkie as they call it in the fandom. This whole day at work he had been trying to come up with new ideas, but the sterile FBI office had never been a good place for him to inspire with new romantic storylines. He opened the fourth e-mail.

'_OMG! I just discovered your stories on LJ and Im beyond hooked. I luuff it! is going to read some more of your stories'_

Don smirked at this last mail. Some people were very eloquent and gave reviews that by itself could be considered a story. Other people however took a slightly different approach and just write a few words, or, as in this case, just wrote their heart out. Don suspected that this last reviewer couldn't be over 14 years old. That didn't matter though. He had to admit that some were dearer to him than others, but every good review was cherished. He clicked to open the next one.

'_Dear ArmedAndDangerous. First of all I would like to say that I have read your stories with great pleasure. I love the way how you write every character so well. I can imagine that, like in your last story where Lorelai and Luke adopt a little girl, how that would put some strain on their relationship, but I love the way you resolved it in the end. I wish my husband would do a thing like that. Ah well, a girl can dream. I am looking forward to your next story, if you ever plan on writing one. Although my husband is great, I need that extra little romance you put in your stories to help me through the day. Thank you dear, and thanks for writing!'_

Now, these were the reviews Don truly loved. He had made someone happy, hopefully in a way that would last beyond the webpage. And that made him happy in return. Of course, the writing itself gave him joy as well, but the reviews was what was making him addicted to the whole thing. Every day after work he would go home and check his inbox. After that he usually had some new ideas to put into a story or a next chapter and he would write for a while. 

And that was what made it so good, Don thought. By concentrating on mundane and trivial things like romantic getaways by Luke and Lorelai he could block some of the horrors he saw in his job. In his first years he had been able to cope quite well with the bad things he came across, but with the years it had become harder. And that was when he discovered fanfiction. He had been a fan of Gilmore Girls from the start (although he'd rather die before anyone finding that out) and while searching on the internet he had discovered this whole new world of fanfiction. After a couple of months reading he had tried to write one on his own, and here he was now. A few years later, and about a 1893 reviews richer. But who's counting.

And now he knew he had to come up with another story. He opened up a new word document and let his fingers hover above the keyboard, waiting for inspiration to strike him. He desperately tried to think of something. Luke and Lorelai. Lorelai and Luke. Doing.. something. Facing some kind of problem. Eventually everything would work out fine and they would live happily ever after. But what should happen before that?

Don hated to admit it, but he was suffering from a major writers-block. His muse, or as they are more generally known, his plot bunny, was not showing up tonight.

After twenty minutes of staring at the computer screen, trying to force his mind to come up with something, he decided he needed a break. He got up from his chair and walked to the kitchen to make himself something to eat.

A little later, while watching the lasagna heat up in the oven, the phone rang and Don picked up.

'Eppes'.

'Hey bro, it's me.' Charlie said, 'Can I ask you something? I mean, you're not busy, are you?'

'No, I'm not busy' Don said with one eye on the still blank Word document on the computer, 'What's the matter?'

'Well, I need you to talk to dad for me. He's driving me crazy'.

'What do you mean? What do you want me to talk to him about?'

'Well, Millie's apartment is being repainted or something and now she's staying here for a week. That's fine of course, but the thing is, they're not leaving the house! When I wake up, they're here in the kitchen. When I'm at CalSci Millie's there. Then, when I come home, she and dad are there again. And when I suggest that they might go out for dinner one night they stare at me like I'm crazy. They just stay at home, every night. Talking and laughing. I can't get any work done with them here. I can't even go to the garage because that's where Millie's furniture is temporarily stored. I'm going crazy, Don. Help me!'

'Well… I can see your problem there. I always suspected that having dad live with you would turn on you someday. So, can't you work at CalSci or something?'

'Don, it's my house! I should be able to work in my own house, shouldn't I? Please, could you talk to dad for me? I tried to talk to him but he immediately accused me of being inhospitable.'

Don could hear Charlie sigh at the other end of the line.

'You know what, Don? At moments like these I wished I could be marooned on some deserted island. I would finally be getting some work done there.'

Suddenly Don had a brilliant flash.

'Marooned on a deserted island, huh?'

'Well, maybe not literally. I would still want to have some internet connection of course…' Charlie continued.

'No, I think a deserted island would do just fine…'Don said while walking back to his computer screen. 'With no one there to disturb you. I mean, everything could happen, right?'

'What? I was joking, Don. Now, would you please talk to dad for me?'

'Eh.. well, Chuck. I cant right now, I eh.. need to do something.' Don said, but he wasn't really listening to Charlie anymore. In his head a brand new story was unfolding and he couldn't wait to type it down.

'Don? I'm not asking for a lot here, can't you just... oh no, dad's pulling out the scrabble board again! You need to help me, please!' Charlie was getting nearly hysterical now, but Don didn't hear him anymore.

'Yeah.. ok. So I'll talk to you later then.' And with that Don hung up.

He sat behind his computer screen, flexed his fingers a few times and after a brief moment of contemplation he typed the first words.

_It was supposed to be a holiday. Luke and Lorelai were celebrating their two year relationship and were heading for Hawaii by plane. Lorelai was leaning against Luke and was thinking that she couldn't wait to go to the beach and swim in the sea. Little did she know that that last wish might be granted a lot sooner than she expected…_

- The End -


End file.
